Wednesday, 31 March 2010

The Five Stages of Tring

The Five Stages of Tring is a phenomenon that occurs at any festival gathering, or to be fair any instance where a tent is involved.
It occurs generally after a long day of walking around, lots of alcohol and other such things. Below I shall take you through, step by step, the wonder of The Five Stages of Tring.

The First Stage

The first stage is when you wake up in a tent, your fully aware of where you are. Your tired, and its very warm. You throw off your sleeping bag and use it to get comfortable. You manage to fall in and out of sleep for the next hour or so.

The Second Stage

The second stage occurs after you have failed to get any sense of sleep. Its getting hotter and stuffier in your tent. The smell of smoke from the nights bonfire lingers in your tent, on your clothes and in your hair. Almost suffocating with the smell you open the tent. This allows some fresh air and enables you to drift back to sleep now that the warm air has left.

The Third Stage

The third stage is a comical one. After getting some actual sleep you feel like interacting with the other campers you are with. You crawl to the front of your tent and set up a nest. With your bag or sleeping used as a pillow you rest while talking with your friends. However in your state you fall back asleep. Half in your tent where it is still warm and half outside where its cool and breezy.

The Fourth Stage

Your almost there now. The fourth stage is a small one. This is when everyone is staring at you and wondering why you aren't up yet. Why are you still wanting to sleep when its sunny and everyone is enjoying themselves. So guilt tripped into getting out you retreat back into your tent to get changed.

The Fifth Stage

And your now a semi functioning member of society once again. The fifth stage is you now out of your tent and sat on a stool,chair or on the floor. You are now ready for the first sip of lager and to start planning your day. Be it seeing bands or going for a hike.

There we go. The five stages of Tring. If you see anyone exhibiting any of the signs, just let them play it out, they'll soon be with you.

NB: The Five Stages of Tring isn't scientifically proven. So if your friend hasn't moved from, lets say, stage 3. Then maybe intervene.

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